Would lighting a memoril candle at a wedding be ok..?

I lost my mom last year...my brother and my sisters thought it would be a good idea to light a candle for her..my fiance also wants to walk to person ...



I lost my mom last year…my brother and my sisters thought it would be a good idea to light a candle for her..my fiance also wants to walk to person that was closet to my mom down the isle with him and his mother would that be a good idea…

19 Responses to “Would lighting a memoril candle at a wedding be ok..?”

  1. CincoBride says:

    The bottom line is do what makes you happy! I like the idea of a candle. I lost my dad a couple of months ago. We decided to have a candle lit beforehand, we’re placing it on a table at the entrance with a card that says "This candle represents the bride’s father, who though he cannot be here in person, will always be with us in spirit."
    I didn’t want to light the candle during the ceremony because I thought it would put too much focus on his loss, rather than remembering that his spirit is with us. But really do what makes you happy, that’s all that matters and what I’m sure your mom would want.

  2. SEXY MAMA says:

    yeah

  3. NY at heart says:

    why not? put a paragraph about her in the wedding programs as well. my hubby and i did that for our grandparents. it was very nice.

  4. luvofrosalitas says:

    Wonderful idea…you are honoring your mother by honoring a good a faithful friend of hers. What a wonderful fiance you have! So sorry about your mother…she will always be with you and so proud, too! Congratulations!

  5. fi ♠ says:

    i think lighting a candle for your mom is a beautiful idea. it should be you that does it, once you’ve walked down the aisle, before the cermony take place. as if you have brought her with you. i’m afraid i didnt really understand the next bit sorry, so i cant comment, but i love the idea of the candle for your mom, good luck

  6. Alana says:

    I think you should seperate the good times from the bad. Though i think it would be nice to mention you mom during a speech or something like that, i believe a memoril is to be done at a time of morning. She will be watching them get married from where ever she is, and though she might not be there in person she’ll be there in heart.

  7. michelle says:

    Awesome ideas!!! I like it when you can add more people to the wedding feel special with a small gesture like that. My husband and I did the candles for both of our Moms since they were gone. During the ceremony I gave a single rose to a few people who were very special to me. (grandma, aunt,)
    Go for it!
    And I am sorry for your loss. But you know she will be watching, with the best seat in the house!! You will feel her there, believe me.

  8. tamlee01 says:

    thats a sweet idea. lighting a candle is a great way for every one to know that in a way your mum is ther watching your special day aswell

  9. happyprecious says:

    Anything goes. It is your wedding and you should celebrate it any way you would like. It is a great idea to honour your mother in that way and a great idea to include her in the wedding. Fantastic idea.

  10. Kate A. says:

    I think that lighting a candle for you Mom is one of the best ideas I have ever heard of. Moms are the best friends a girl has in her life, and it is important that you include her, even if its just in spirit! I lost my Grandma in December, and for her birthday we still lit candles for her, and ate a cake. Haha. But I also think it is a great idea that your fiance has about walking someone that she was close to down the isle. Your day will be perfect!

  11. momblessedx5 says:

    A lady I know just got married recentlry. This past winter her sister died in a car accident. She was suppose to be her maid of honor. She skipped having a maid of honor and at the reception where her sister would have sat she had a picture of her and a candle lit. I think it is a great idea as well as walking the person close to your mom down the aisle. I am sorry for your loss and I hope you have a wonderful day.

  12. Lydia says:

    I know it’s hard to lose a parent, mine are both gone. My father died before I was married. I think the best time for recognition is at the reception, when you are giving your talk. Your mom will be watching over you all day, proud as punch that you are getting married, wishing for your happiness. Keep the ceremony a time for happiness, for the joining of you two in marriage. You will be thinking of your mom regardless.
    Wish you well!

  13. Maria S says:

    Yup, I like both your ideas.

  14. Crazy Buzy Princess says:

    I think a candle or empty chair, etc. are fine ways to honor those who have passed. I agree with not spending too much time or focus on that though, as it is your wedding and a happy time. I had an empty chair for my brother, but I did not make a big deal out of it, as I didn’t want to cast a pall on the wedding and I knew he wouldn’t have wanted the attention, etc. anyway. Celebrate your union!

  15. phantom_of_valkyrie says:

    My good friend got married a couple years ago. She lost her mother to a rare disease in high school. Her fiance/husband lost his mother to cancer in high school as well.

    What they decided to do was–they had both their brothers walk down the aisle at the time when mothers traditionally would, to light the unity candle. At the reception they had gotten pictures of their mother made into art (you can do it online–send in a picture and they transfer it onto canvas) and framed them side by side in matching frames. They were at the beginning of the receiving line.

    I have also heard of a bride stopping on her walk down the aisle and placing a rose on the reserved seat in the front for her mother. Just carry a seperate flower from your bouquet and lay it down on that seat. Make sure you’ve informed whoever has the spot beside the reserved seat (an aunt or grandmother) as to what you are doing so she doesn’t think you are handing the flower to her.

    I think its an excellent idea to honor your mother. After all, she dreamed of this day in your life as much as you have.

  16. mmbhorngangsta says:

    Many people do this actually. What i’ve seen and liked the best is the bride just before the ceremony lighting a candle for her mother. Many times the bride will carry the corsage that would have been for her mother and place it in front of the candle. I believe this is a great way of honoring the memory of your mother and acknowledging that she is there with you.

    If you aren’t doing corsages for the moms/grandmothers, than perhaps a single white rose (as white often stands for purity) and place that in front of the candle.

    I personally wouldn’t want anyone to replace my mother in the ceremony, so I would not have the groom walk anyone but his own mother. If you’d like, the groom could carry the flower/corsage when he brings his own mother down and like i said before place it in front of the candle. And then you could light the candle later. Good luck hunni!

  17. Lisa B says:

    We’re doing that at our wedding in 3 weeks. I have a small round table that I’m going to place under the portego with us that will hold a hurricane globe sitting on a mirror holding a lit candle in memory of both sets of our parents who have passed away. I also have framed pictures of the parents to place on the table with the candle and the picture of my parents is on their wedding day. I’m not going to light my candle as part of the ceremony, it will already be lit. I just don’t think I could do that without breaking down.
    Good luck on your wedding day!

  18. Amy T says:

    Yes. You should definately honor your mother at your wedding. I like the idea of putting a paragraph about her in your program. Have a special song played while you light the candle for her.

  19. hotdog says:

    i went to a wedding that they lit a candle in memory of her dad who had died…sorry but i think it was morbib…
    it brought back memories and i felt like it turned into a memorial funeral thing…
    maybe it’s me but still?
    maybe something like a candle in the foyer of the church and a nice poem or flowers or anything, but please dont do the candle at the beginning!
    good luck

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